In response to a recent facebook post....

So I know I mostly use this blog to share stories and pictures of the kids. But since it is my blog after all, I am going to respond to another blogpost I read recently posted on Facebook by a few people. I am not going to link specifically to the blogpost, mostly bc I feel like the author meant well. But the gist of the blogpost was that a young mother was chastised by another woman in her church bc her clothes, in this woman's opinion, were a tad tighter now that she had carried a child nine months and then delivered him. The woman had taken the time to call the young mother and ask her questions such as, "was what you were wearing causing men in our church to stumble? Were you preventing others from worshipping?" I just about stopped reading the blog at that point bc I knew where it was going. But I read on. And it made me sad. I have, as well as many other women, been in a place post baby where things just don't fit right. Heck, getting yourself and your children/baby to church those first few months is a miracle in itself. The author states she felt the woman had every right to say what she did. That she should have been more careful dressing now that she had to bend to pick upon a baby or reach down to change diapers. And perhaps she does. I don't know. But what I do know is that there was a long list of things that woman could have called her up to say. "can I bring a meal?" or "what's your favorite coffee?" or "you are doing a good job, hang in there." And we wonder why young people leave the church. Why there are so many with such a sour view of Christianity. I have problems with this story for so many reasons. Not the least of which is the fact that I have several close friends who have struggled with eating disorders over the years. And I can't think of anything more damaging to a young mother's spirit than a phone call criticizing her appearance. We can never know what another person's internal struggles may be. What damage we might cause with unkind words or criticisms thinly veiled as a 'I'm saying this because I love you" speech. When that lady was busy planning her after church phone call to that one mother, she apparently forgot to take a moment to check herself. To think about what her "important" phone call might cause another person to feel or think. I just do not feel Jesus would ever ask us to make such a phone call. I just cant help think that there was a golden opportunity to minister and lift up a young mother that day that was sorely missed. All in the name of keeping "worship" safe from the wandering eye of a man who apparently can't control himself or his thoughts. If we the church are to be a place of refuge and encouragement, let us simply do it! Let us speak words that lift others up. That make them feel included and wanted. if nothing else, the blogpost I read this week was a reminder to me to be sure I speak encouragement to others. To be a light to them when I can be. And to worry a whole lot less about what someone may or may not be wearing when he or she comes for worship.